Future Facts: Big Brother


The real problem present dwellers have is being on ‘the grid’. If you use email or twitter, then the evil federal government already has your thoughts on file. It’s very simple. If the government can break into your home without a warrant, then your liberties will erode, right? Therefore you should only buy things with cash. Or better yet, gold ignots.

I know, debit cards are a convenience so powerful that its not considered realistic to try and do business without them nowadays. But guess what? If you use one the government can track your purchases! If you did something suspicious like buy underpants, the government will know about it. Do you want the government to know that you wear clothes beneath your pants? Or what about that cabbage you bought for dinner? If you really think its a good idea to be public about that, then you can explain your subversive vegetables to homeland security.

This problem of Big Brother got really bad by 2024, especially in regards to airline security. What they did was just have randomly selected people do a little “security dance” It works like a rain dance, except it actually had a placebo effect on the passengers’ perceptions. Also, if it’s taking forever to get on the plane, there would be free entertainment.

People worry in your naively complacent time period about having your phone line tapped. Well, that will seem pretty tame once Big Brother starts tapping your kidneys. I warned you.

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One thought on “Future Facts: Big Brother

  1. This seems backward. They check in your undies in 2011 before you can fly, yet in 2024, they make you dance before flying? By 2050, perhaps a polite, “How do you do mame?” and a tip of the hat. That would be lovely!

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